Hookup Etiquette: 5 things you need to know

We’ve all heard to treat hookups like gremlins: don’t take them out during the day, get them wet and don’t feed them after midnight.

In other words, don’t be seen in public with them (people will think you are together), don’t shower with them (it’s just too intimate) and don’t take them out on a date or make them food (it’s too much like a boyfriend/girlfriend thing).

This is a solid quote to live by if you’re not looking for something serious, but there are a few other things you should have in your rule book. To make a hookup – namely friends with benefits – work you may want to stick to these guidelines:

1. Stay Protected

There’s never a reason to take the risk. Acronyms are preventable, so both parties should always be prepared.

2. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

If you have another person in your little black book, no need to let them know and vice versa. You may want to never ask any questions besides when and where.

3. Turn Around Time

For it to stay strictly a hookup with no feelings attached, it can’t last too long. Some would say anything more than two weeks would cross over into the potential relationship zone.  

4. If You Want to Just Fork, Don’t Spoon

Anything intimate is off limits. Coitus doesn’t always have to lead to cuddling, if it’s just for f*ck’s sake.

5. Don’t Go Destiny’s Child

No “say my name, say my name.” But if you do, make sure it’s the right one.