I know. It sounds like the epitome of an oxymoron. “Social introvert” – doesn’t seem like it makes sense. But trust me, we’re out there.
Most people think that you fit into one of two categories: introvert or extrovert. But there are people that fall somewhere in between – extroverted introverts or social introverts. And I’m a proud one.
I enjoy being with friends, going to the concerts – even somewhat got over my fear of public speaking. But that doesn’t mean I recharge from being around people. Most Friday nights consist of Netflix, YouTube and writing. I would rather have a meaningful conversation than small talk, and groups of more than three make me uneasy.
If that sounds like you, you may be a social introvert too. Here are some other ways to know:
You’re most comfortable in small groups
Socializing doesn’t frighten you; you’re just not ready to hang with a group of 20. Small talk isn’t something that you find fun or can even maneuver. But a meaningful conversation you can get onboard with. And people might even mistake you for an extrovert during these convos.
Spontaneity is stressful
Introverts like having time to think before doing. So when called out, we simply don’t know what to do. Whether that be an on-the-spot question in class or a sudden switch in plans, they need time to process, contemplate and assess the whole situation.
Crowds of people are okay as long as you have a friend
Traditional introverts have the stereotype of staying in every night and loving every second. Social introverts can enjoy that too, but not as much as traditional ones.
Social introverts love to go to big events, but they would rather go with one or two friends rather than a huge group.
You gravitate towards one person when in groups
In team projects, clubs and even work environments, you will make that one friend you’re completely outgoing with while everyone else still thinks you’re awkwardly quiet. That’s okay! Though everyone else may think you’re soft spoken, the person you’re most comfortable with will know the inner you.
New people think you’re shy
Meeting new people is when your introversion really comes out. Ice breakers make you look like an awkward giraffe that never quite got it’s baring with verbal communication — you also may have never gotten leg strength either.
And your close friends don’t understand why
Your close (possibly small) group of friends know you so well that they have forgotten your introvert tendencies. You’re loud, witty and passionate.
With this circle of friends, your hidden personality comes out.
Featured image by Netanya Walton